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LAKE PARADOX
LAKE PARADOX is a region located in upstate New York, around the base of the Adirondacks. Roughly a three and a half hour drive from New York City, it's a great place to get away from the bustle and chaos of urban living.

While the number of year-round residents is relatively small, the area's population swells to tens of thousands around summertime, attracting visitors to the shoreline and campgrounds. A smaller revival comes around in the winter, when the resorts and ski lodges open up at first snowfall, and the lake freezes over for ice skating.

But what makes Lake Paradox stand out from other retreats are its more eccentric attractions, like the UFO landing sites and haunted hotel tours. Most activity centers around two charming lakeside towns, PARADOX VILLAGE and ONEIDA LANDING.

PARADOX VILLAGE

An area at the south end of Lake Paradox, the village is a famous tourist destination, originally established with the construction of Fort George in 1755. The town is known to be the hub of summer vacation activities — with boat launches and seafood restaurants, shops full of tchotchkes and airbrushed t-shirts — anyone enjoying the lake comes through Paradox Village at some point. Below are some notable landmarks and businesses in and around town! (Click to expand details.)
FORT GEORGE Settled in 1755, Fort George is a popular tourism destination for history buffs who love reading about the "friendly" relationship between colonists and the indigenous people of the area, with rosy accounts of the way the locals "shared" their land with the colonists. However, the ghosts haunting the fort tell a much different story.
the settler shop A souvenir shop on Lake Shore Drive full of knickknacks and gifts, including t-shirts, porcelain black bears, magnets and postcards, as well as a large collection of UFO-sighting memorabilia. The Settler Shop is known for their brilliant neon t-shirts that seem to show up in everyone's luggage, even if they don't remember purchasing them.
The Flying Saucer A UFO-themed diner, the Flying Saucer is open 24/7 and has seen it all: drunk college students, drunk bachelorette parties, drunk moms without kids, and a feature on Diners, Drive-Ins & Dives. Owned by Coot Thorne, resident alien enthusiast, and the mayor's eccentric husband.
paradox putt-putt A hangout favored by the young and old, the mini-golf course is fun for all ages. Unless you're looking to complete the whole thing - the last hole is notoriously difficult, if not impossible to sink. Sometimes the balls seem irretrievable, only to appear randomly across town in someone's sock drawer.
house of frankenstein wax museum A year-round haunted house, the House of Frankenstein Wax Museum fills a strange corner of the main street of Paradox Village. Run by the elusive L.R. Niets, the wax museum is filled with ghoulies and goblins, all slightly melted, coated in dust, somehow only adding to the macabre ambiance. A popular mainstay for tourists and teenagers alike, the Wax Museum often offers specials for anyone who brings a family photo. No reason.
WLPX Radio Station Managed by town local Emika Takahashi, the town's local radio station is run out of a quaint little house in Paradox Village. They produce a wide variety of shows, from local news, different music shows, and to a late night spectacle dedicated to discussing UFO sightings. One of the most popular shows at the station is WICH, run by Emika's daughter Isabella, and deals with local events, mysteries, call-ins and other interesting tidbits. Tune in to 88.8 FM to listen!

LAKE SHORE DRIVE

The main thoroughfare that runs all the way around the lake, it's the home of most of the motels between Paradox Village and Oneida Landing, with a max speed of 35 MPH. When not interrupted by resorts built in the 1940s, the roadside is overrun with trees and hidden local roads leading into the neighborhoods of the more permanent townies.
the windemere An enormous Victorian-era resort, the Windemere is haunted as fuck. Multiple wings have burned down on separate occasions, and while they have been rebuilt, they always smell like sulfur. Doors lead to nowhere, and staircases never end, or finish abruptly, or disappear. Figures in paintings watch you, porcelain dolls in rooms move, the pipes whisper and definitely don't look into the mirrors. Otherwise, though, it's very pretty — and very expensive!
Passageway Motel & Inn One of the more affordable motels on Lake Shore Drive, Passageway has a decidedly eerie vibe no matter how many renovations it goes through. The hallways always seem to go on forever. It probably doesn't help that room 307 and the pool act as corridors to other universes and planes of existence. The barriers between worlds are thin here, making it the perfect place for rituals, transitions, possessions - you name it.
lakeview campgrounds The public campgrounds on the water have over a hundred tent and trailer sites, with amenities such as restrooms, hot showers, firepits and picnic tables. Cabins can be reserved in advance. Campers can go for a dip in the lake, kayak or fish, or they can head up on a hiking trail. Supposedly, one of the UFO crash sites can be found in those hills, though others have tried searching for Bigfoot there, too. But he prefers to be called Harry, and doesn't like his photo taken.

ONEIDA LANDING

About ten miles up Lake Shore Drive from Paradox Village, the Landing is a smaller hamlet more popular with locals than the tourists. Known for the series of restaurants with expansive decks overlooking the lake, Oneida Landing provides a low-key getaway from your getaway.
antiques store The Antique Store started as just the old Deetz house, spilling things out into the front lawn off Lake Shore Drive. However, once Old Man Deetz died, his kids didn't want to deal with his stuff and just put up an "Antiques Store" sign and started selling his junk. Rumor is you'll never get to the end of the antique store, no matter how long you explore.
the fantastic bat Found in one of the oldest buildings in Paradox, the Fantastic Bat has been a bar for the last fifty years, and it has never changed ownership from its mysterious and cool owner Jackie Daytona. Not only does it serve a wide variety of normal to bizarre drinks, but it also hosts a trivia night every Wednesday, happy hours Thursday and Friday, and live music most nights, performed by local bands or visiting spectral troupes.
library & archives Surrounded by thick trees, the library is small but fully stocked. One might say overstocked, actually, with the amount of books found spilling from every corner and every inch of wall space covered with shelves and other knick knacks. They're hard to sort through, but you usually always end up leaving with just the book that you needed at the time - even if you weren't sure what you were looking for in the first place. Try not to get lost, and definitely don't try to access the lower levels with the barred doors. There's nothing to see down there.
post office If you're hoping to receive mail on time, you had better not rely on the Paradox Post Office. Run by postmaster Gill Powell, it appears that most mail disappears. It might have something to do with his best friend Doug, a cosmic entity that lives behind a portal in the back room, and loves reading letters.
Schooner or Later This is where you can hire a variety of boats for getting out onto the water, for relaxation, exploration, or to use to visit the restaurants and their docks dotted along the shore of the lake. Its owner, Vernon 'Salty Dog' Smithers, is rumored to be an actual pirate from the 18th century who accidentally sailed through a wormhole. But that can't be true, can it? Either way, he's always got a tall tale to tell, and leads sea shanties at Patchy's Pirate Palace down the road.

...but wait, there's more!

Please note the map is not all-inclusive, and only shows the highlights and rough geography! Normal businesses and locales such as the neighborhood pharmacy, elementary and high schools, dentistry, police station, cemetery, public park, etc. exist, but are not listed. If you'd like to add a destination or business to our directory, please fill out the form!